Complicated..

My body starting get cold if I hear the sound... Coming nearer and nearer.Then I cannot move and get nervous. Then I know the time, he will text me. Like normal.. asking me to go out.. but, I WONT.
Then I'll regret for not going out, AS USUAL. haizz..~ stupid me. I almost just repeating the same thing every week.. I always think that Im not that weak, but who knews.. LOVE is powerful. In the bible Love can be replace by Patient... what does that really meant..? its hard to be explain and I think theres no limited explanation for the LOVE word.
But, starting to want me. And Im starting to prevent-ing... I don't feel good when he wanna kiss me or what. It just making wanna punch him, but still got the feeling want him to do that to me. Its complicated, I don't know how to describe these kind of situation.. it was complicated. Whether Im crushing on him or fall on him.. I really don't know. But I still waiting for his text, and when I receive his massage I'll feel very happy and exiting. I think im just treat as a very important friend... Just my thinking, hope to hear some comment from my friends. I appriciate it...(=